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Thursday, May 31, 2007Book Club Food: Me Talk Pretty One Day
Seeing as how David Sedaris is a satirist, I can only imagine him stumbling across this entry and finding something incredibly disturbing about how a woman actually went through his entire book and wrote down all the food he mentioned. It's especially ridiculous given how much food he mentions, some offhanded, some as a meal, some as a joke, etc. etc. I must admit, I could barely keep up, and still there are some I didn't note.
Meanwhile, I want to disclaimer this by saying, no, I am not crazy. I think. Anyway, David, I expect to hear about this the next time you're on Letterman! Normally I'd give a plot summary on the books we read, but this is a collection of short stories. The general theme is Not Fitting In. It's his impressions on growing up as a transplanted gay New Yorker in North Carolina, coming of age while pretending his way through art school, and settling down in France with his American boyfriend without knowing a word of French. Ok, he knew a word. "Bottleneck." That kind of sums it up right there. It was on the bestseller list forever, and probably still is (I'm not looking), so you probably have a general idea about it. I'd say more and quote some and list my favorite stories, but bajillions of people have already done that, and...plus... I just don't want to be That Lady That Found All The Food In The Book And Also Quoted Stuff. So there. One disclaimer, I am just listing the real food--not mummified litchi nuts or aspirin sauce. Although, is performance art considered real food? Hm. Food in Me Talk Pretty One Day BBQ chicken, potato chips, Coke cookies vodka martini grapefruit soda hamburger white wine & cutlets jumbo shrimp & stuffed mushrooms pineapple fudge, gingerbread cabin, ice cream, Peeps, whipped topping, sausages, frosting Mountain Dew, grits, hushpuppies prime rib spanikopita Jawbreakers and bite-sized candy bars Boiled Beef Arkansas hot dog, eggs, chicken back Gatorade, beer, "piping hot" coffee patty melt macaroni hot dog chocolate milk & hashbrowns brie apple pie lamb chops 5-alarm chilli steak chocolate sandwiches French Fries, carrots, chicken legs, corn on the cob, & green beans melons, tomatoes cornbread & gingersnaps iced tea candy, ice cream, bbq ribs, baked potato, sirloin nachos, chicken wings pizza with canned veggies on top scotch hot tea *whew* Our Menu Cornbread Carolina Blond BBQ Sandwiches Fried green tomatoes Cole slaw Macaroni & cheese Salad Apple pie Hard lemonade Recipes Carolina Blond BBQ Sandwiches (based on 1996 Cooking Light recipe) 1 cup ketchup 1/2 cup water 1/4 cup cider vinegar 2 tablespoons minced onions or dried onions 2 tablespoons dark brown sugar 1 tablespoon prepared mustard 1 teaspoon pepper 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder 1 1/2 cups (3/4 pound) skinned, shredded roasted chicken breast 6 toasted buns Combine all ingredients except chicken in a medium saucepan; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; simmer 5 minutes or until mixture begins to thicken. Stir in chicken, and cook until roasted chicken is thoroughly heated. Note: This recipe is quite forgiving. I added a little mustard to it, dashed in the pepper, added garlic salt, and generally adjusted ingredients to my taste. It's very difficult to ruin! Fried Green Tomatoes Tuesday, May 29, 2007Work Makes You CrankyReferencing Madness
There are a lot of things about editing that aren't exciting or interesting, but such is the nature of a job that preserves the written word. Right on the other hand, there is very little about it that is extraordinarily maddening. Sure, copyediting can be irritating, but it can also be hilariously amusing if you're the kind of person that choked back laughter in the middle of your SATs over dangling participles. Which I am. In fact, when I taught, I regularly called friends to read them the gems produced by my students, my favorite one being, "The English were at war and the French were revolting."
Think about it. Haphazard authors, late reviewers, non-compliant assistant editors...all these can be overlooked most days. But there is one nemesis that I hate above all others, whether I am writing or editing: REFERENCES My sworn blood enemy. If references were a person, I would demand it find its second, choose a weapon, and give me satisfaction. The problem with references is, they are like algebra problems with calculus answers: the example in the book/instructions is rarely as complicated as the reality. And thanks to The Internets, which is otherwise my friend, references continue to get more complicated and no style manual seems to be able to keep up, particularly in the medical field. Unfortunately, the medical field is my primary line of interest. It seems as though an undercurrent of desperation to hold on to "real" sources leads to a the neglect of creating a proper form for New References. I can understand the frustration and desire to do so, but the truth is, the future is here. I might not need such examples for a bona fide medical article, but my boss is an Editor in Chief whose current interest lies in Web 2.0's effect on the medical field. I am tasked with formatting the references, and each time feel that I am simply without a net. Who knows if they are truly correct? My current project includes referencing the following: 4 journal articles 1 book Wikipedia 2 online academic libraries O'Reilly's blog 2 online serials An online learning program A PDF fact sheet There is one example for this particular journal's use of online sources, and it refers to a paper journal that is also cited online. Wouldn't we all be so lucky. Of course the theory behind references is logical--not only does it ensure the source is genuine but the citation makes it findable to future scholars. It's simple enough, but when every journal has its own charming way of presenting said reference and proceeds to hit writers over the head with every little colon and semicolon, one has to wonder if such an exercise is truly helpful or a way of weeding out authors that evolved past the anal-fixation phase. This is always what I fear. And so, I fixate, pleading to Professor Google to give me an answer. But I am denied. As much as I love the clever little college writing workshop fact sheets that dot the Web, they are not even close to American Medical Association style. Furthermore, most of the true authorities on style insist on keeping their wishes offline and in hardback books, which is counterintuitive to today's usage, not to mention counterproductive as new publishing formats emerge constantly. I mean, do you want me to use your style or not? Instead I find myself devising a formula based on tons of examples, not unlike creating a new recipe, spending several days on reference sheets but never knowing if the final product is sufficient. Seriously, references should be stopped. Labels: editing Monday, May 14, 2007Book Club Food: Bunny Tales
Yes, yes, I know. "Bunny Tales: Behind Closed Doors of the Playboy Mansion" by Izabella St. James was our "off" month after some intellectual heavy hitters. We wanted to have a gossipy, junk food meeting and bring our guys, so why not?
Exciting it was not. There's a whole chapter literally "behind closed doors" involving house layout, furniture, carpet quality, and bedroom design. Sure, there's a little backstabbing dish on the Current Girlfriends that you see on The Girls Next Door on E! and reveals about party nights, but mostly there's a lot of whining about rules and reassurances that they are all wonderful, intelligent people that are totally not sponging off of an only somewhat rich old man who is such a drag for not letting them have other boyfriends, too. *yawn* If you want to give it a try and just have fun with it, hand out red pens with each copy: The copyeditors obviously fell asleep at the wheel, because the grammatical and typesetting errors are truly egregious to the point of hilarity. Too bad for a book attempting to assert the author's legitimacy as a non-dumb blond with a law degree. Food mentioned in the book: Chicken Fajitas Salmon Penne & Alfredo Cheeseburgers Skinny Fries Chips & Guacamole Fried Chicken Pork Chops Edamame Oh Henry bars English Muffin & Strawberry Jam Lipton Chicken Soup & Crackers Apple Sauce Peas Haagen Daas Strawberry Ice Cream Thin Crust Cheese Pizza Cabernet Shiraz Coffee "Famous" Mansion Cookies Daquiris Jack & Pepsi Mai Tai Muffins Hot chocolate Champagne Apple Martinis Red-headed Slut Served: Turkey Burgers & Cheese Cheese & Crackers Chips & Salsa Edamame * Veggie Plate & Dip Skinny Fries * Chocolate Chip Cookies * Haagen Daas Strawberry Ice Cream * Labels: book club Tuesday, May 08, 2007PF Chang's Recipe Theft Continues
Another trip to PF Chang's produced another recipe search for the fabulous Key Lime Pie Martini. I haven't tried this at home yet, so I'm not sure of the proportions with half and half and whipped cream, but the article below was the only place I could find the true recipe and I thought it merited reposting. Literally, it is just like having a slice of Key Lime Pie without the puddingness and with more bite. It's best as an after dinner drink, although it wasn't too bad with our requisite this story. Vanilla is one of the "43" flavors in the liquor, but the other spicier and citrusy flavors make it less cloyingly sweet, as vanilla tends to be.
PF Chang's Key Lime Pie Martini 1.5 ounces Licor 43 1/2 ounces Key Lime West Juice half and half whipped cream crushed graham crackers Labels: recipes Friday, May 04, 2007You Animal, You![]() Lex, Window Hunting ![]() Lex Reads the Saturday Paper ![]() Wild Turkey Hen on JTB ![]() Mother Goose Takes a Nap ![]() Nesting at the Mall Thursday, May 03, 2007Shout Out! Maybe.
Call me delusional, but I do believe I got a shout out in today's Get Fuzzy. Observe the final panel:
![]() Yes, from yonder days of ICQ, my online handle has contained some variation of Palladio, originally inspired by the original de Beers diamonds commercials, starring the symphony "Palladio" by Karl Jenkins. I mean, I guess it could be solely an architectural joke. BUT MAYBE, seeing as how the Get Fuzzy panels from this site now pepper the internetverse sans copyright, this is my pal Darby Conley's way of saying... ![]() To which I reply... ![]() But, then again, you know. Maybe not. ![]() Tuesday, May 01, 2007Book Club Food: The Birth of Venus
The Birth of Venus by Sarah Dunant (every time I type that, I type my own name and then have to backspace to fix it) is a fairly popular book club book as is, so I probably don't need to sell it too hard. Essentially, it's the coming of age story of a girl in the height of the Venetian Golden Age, during the reign of the de Medecis, the French invasion, and the evil priest Savanarola. Lucretzia has an unusual understanding of art for a girl of her time, and of course there is a not-terribly-shocking reason why that we find out later.
(What follows are my personal feelings on it, and your mileage may vary.) In short, the best part about this book was the very detailed, thorough description of Venice, art, and family life. Dunant is certainly in love with that time and setting, and it shows. It nearly balances out my intense dislike of books written from the precocious, preternaturally brilliant, anachronistically liberal mind of a teenage girl, but not quite. Lucretzia, like most 14/15 year old girls, is cruisin' for a bruisin' thanks to her bullheadedness, and she gets it in spades, some deserved, some not. The problem is, she's in the middle of a very deadly time, and mostly I found myself wanting to shake her silly and tell her to get a grip. The vivid details of The Birth of Venus apply even to the lurid, seamier side, and that is some relief from the sugary-to-angsty adolescence of its speaker. Its discussion of slavery, sexuality (homo- and hetero-), diseases, and dismemberment is more than frank. Once she grew up a little, I found the book a little easier to stomach, but unfortunately there are also several distractingly abrupt character personality changes (not all hers) that serve to wrap up the storyline. Charming and convenient, but inexplicable and unlikely. Further, there are a few hints at even more non-coincidental tie-ins of other famous names towards the end, but I'm not sure if my fevered mind was just hoping they really meant something. Saying that, I think the end could have used a little more polishing; it's already nearly 400 pages, and details were certainly not sparing in other parts, so I found the whimsical suggestions without follow-through a bit annoying. To finish, it's a very womany book club book, replete with a discussion guide in the back, so if that's your thing, enjoy. Her next book is about a Venetian courtesan of the same era, so if you like the setting but not the characters, that might serve you better. Now on to what really matters: THE FOOD. Food Mentioned in The Birth of Venus: (grouped if it was a meal) Roast meat & spiced gravies Boiled capon, roast pheasant, trout, pastas, saffron pudding, creme brulee, & wine Roasted peacock's tongues, turtle dove, chamois deer, boiled capon, chicken, veal, whole roasted kid; fish pie with oranges, nutmegs, saffron and dates Milk puddings Sweet meats and sugared almonds Bread and pork jelly Fragrant white wine and pigeons Figs, pomegranites, walnuts, and herbs Spiced wine Bread and quince preserves Roasted chestnuts Cold meats, pork jelly, fresh roasted pike stuffed with raisins Fried zucchini flowers Our Menu The problem here is that the food is fairly medieval. Nobody was about to go rip out a few peacock tongues or boil up some pork jelly, so we just went with Italian. Bruschetta Baked Ziti Salad with Italian dressing and fruits Breadsticks Tiramisu Venetian Sunset (sparkling white wine, pineapple juice, cherry juice, crushed ice) Red and white wine |
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